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Everything posted by msinkblot

  1. Hi all! I'm wondering what you guys look for mala beads? I want something to ground me, to give me a sense of security and awareness of everyday things. I am in general very airy and wispy (I would say a stone like lapis lazuli actually aggravates my general state). I always feel untethered and easily overwhelmed, hence my love of arm balances and inversions, I think! THey really, ironically, tether me to the ground by reminding me of my foundation. For the mala, I was thinking of including African bloodstone, onyx and lava stone to it... does that make sense? Any other suggestions for grounding stones? Where do you guys usually buy your mala bracelets? (I'm getting mine customized on Etsy if possible) Thanks!
  2. I'm curious about this. I know how to use blocks and how useful they can be, but I've been using a scarf as a strap (very creative I know, hah). I'm wondering if I should invest in a proper strap? I usually use it for straight leg IT band stretches or as a way to train my shoulders not to collapse in handstand. I know you can also use them to increase flexibility for deep backbends. Besides that... not so much. Also, anyone use an infinity strap?
  3. I'm curious about your experience with yoga and eating disorders. Is it a safe way to treat EDs? Do any of you have any personal experiences? I know for me, it helped me to accept myself as I was, wherever I was, and not be so harsh on myself. I haven't had a diagnosable ED, but I have a few friends struggling with EDs at the moment and I'm wondering if yoga could become another harmful coping mechanism, or something beneficial. I have been in the position of having to gain weight to get my period back and it's a very frightening position to be in! So I can understand some of the struggle of recovery.
  4. Do any of you have periods in which you just stop practicing after a life change? Recently I came back from Singapore and I experienced such a physical /emotional / spiritual overhaul there that it came upon me like a tide change. Upon returning to Montreal, I haven't actually done my daily practice. Partly because I realize I was unconsciously using it as a way to 'exercise', and not to really be calm (although it did make me calm). I've been interested in perhaps pursuing a softer, yin practice and I've been exploring pranayama. But I find it's kind of hard to explore that side of yoga... which is what I"m interested in. I have zero motivation to do arm balances (although I still do inversions for fun) or a vigorous 'strong' practice. Ironically I have lost weight... maybe that's part of the reason why I'm not keen to pursue a strong practice. Do you guys have any experience experiencing such a period of 'drought' from physical asana? I really want to go back into yoga, but I don't know quite how to start. I want to enter it from the other limbs... if you guys have suggestions, I'd been so grateful!
  5. Wow, hippotherapy sounds great. I've always wanted to be with horses, but I guess I will have to wait till Singapore where horse-riding is a thing (they probably have therapy too, although I'd like to take up riding all the same :D). We don't really have a stables in Montreal, strangely! Only the police ride horses, haha. Your horses sound really sweet, and I imagine being around animals is very soothing, like a form of yoga. As for disordered eating/ eating disorders, I think I exhibited clear signs of disordered eating perhaps when I was 17-18 (say, 8 years ago) for a short period. But I had no idea 'how to eat', and the food at home was not to my tastes so everything turned me off (I had just moved from Singapore to Canada). I had a period of just eating nuts and oatmeal because I disliked my stepmum's cooking. I couldn't digest it, though, and I had stomach issues every single day (maybe 'healthy food' works for some people, but for me it doesn't). I was used to eating rice, fish, soft white bread everyday and the rice at home was too dry, the meat and everything was too oily I couldn't eat it. The only time we ate fish... it was deep-fried and I disliked it. I was already a picky eater, but this was different. Somehow this turned a switch on in my brain... and I think that was what triggered it. I sort of decided to try and make all my own meals... and as a 17 year-old, it spiralled down into disordered eating. Nowadays, the 'switch' is off. I don't get urges to not eat or eat less... if I eat less on a given day, I actually feel guilty about it and try to make up for it. I let myself have 2nd and 3rd dessert if I want or a snack at 1am (I do this almost everyday because it helps me to sleep). I have difficulties eating in the afternoon, so allowing myself food at night works. I found a way around those neural circuits and gradually I think they changed. It took about 3 years though for the thoughts to disappear so they were not dominant. And till then I still had episodes of conscious/subconscious restriction followed by binge episodes when my body panicked. I never gained or lost weight during these episodes after the initial gain (to get my period back), so it was mostly a mental battle.
  6. This post was very helpful for me too. I have a friend who also often catastrophes all the time when we talk, and it can be frustrating when she brings up the same anxieties again and again. I love the idea of journaling / writing down stuff. I have a friend with BDD who says she uses a similar technique: she writes down the worst anxieties she has in almost fiction way, and plays them out. And miraculously, it gets rid of them as if by writing the worst possible scenarios that could happen, she realizes they are not so bad... I also have the same technique that @becca515 mentioned that I find useful. Although for me, I try to reach inside my energy body and feel the cord, and cut it. Sometimes I use a physical object. Before I cut it though, I make an evocation ie. "What I do is for the highest good". It works like magic for me if something gets too intense, as long as the cord doesn't grow back, haha! I find visualization + ritual can be such a powerful tool when simple meditation does not help. Which is the case for me.
  7. I'm not sure where to put this so I think I'd put it just in the general discussion forum. I'm doing an asana art series and I'd love to know your interpretations/requests of poses you'd like to see drawn. I've attached the pieces I've finished so far. I sort of moved from the quiet poses (supine twist, lotus, child's pose variation) to the fiery poses (eagle, scorpion, crow) and now to the heart-opening poses (king pigeon, now working on kapotasana). My question would be... what poses would you like to see drawn? I was thinking doing one with a series of warriors and also the swan dive from tadasana. Any favourite poses from you guys?
  8. Thanks @KateZena! I've sort of fallen out of my yoga practice but recently I got a dream to draw Bow pose... I sort of dislike that pose a lot. But maybe I'll get to it sometime!
  9. @katezena That was a really beautiful story! And I can totally empathize. I also tend to lose weight in times of stress/changes/ travel. I am (or was till 1 month ago) also a 95 pound girl who can't afford to lose weight... I lose 5 pounds in 2 weeks and take 6 months to gain it back. So losing weight because of those stressors can really make me careen backwards. Recently, I've been trying to incorporate Candace's "5 breath meditation" into my mealtimes. I will tune in for 5 breaths and most of the time, I realize how tense my body always is. It really helps me to have meal times be my "peaceful" time, haha. Having lost weight again after some recent travels (I was eating well but maybe not enough for the amount of walking I was doing), I'm trying to get back in the wagon of not letting my mood interfere with my appetite. It's definitely an ongoing journey. It's really nice to meet others with the same struggle. In a society in general celebrates losing weight, it's kind of hard to be in a position of having to gain weight without feeling a bit silly. You also mention equine therapy: how's that going with you? It sounds really lovely. I'd love to hear your experiences with that too.
  10. It looks beautiful!! You have similar wrists to me as well It's really hard to find a mala that fits perfectly huh? Although mine wraps around 6 times as well quite nice. Interesting choice of stones, as well! Is that lapis lazuli and amethyst? Very gorgeous. I attached a picture of mine as well. It's not very clear, but it's mostly grounding stones. It's a bit intense compared to yours, I think! But I swear it has helped my handstand practice. If it's psychological, it counts right? Haha.
  11. That sounds so lovely @yogafire! Can we have a picture!? I'm so curious!!
  12. Hi! I took my first aerials class yesterday and I LOVE IT. Oh, my arms though! They killed my arms. Although all the inversions I do in my yoga practice helped a lot. What I want to know is... have you guys ever tried the yoga trapeze? I've seen it around a bit and I want to know what you guys think. What was your experience? I'm thinking of getting one because it looks really fun. I also love the sensation of being upside down and it seems a nice way of leisurely dangling upside down without expending too much effort.
  13. That information is good to know @Anahata. I didn't know it was more of a gymnastics move. I was just kind of taken aback, haha! I was feeling really uncomfortable trying to do that- so much cranking on the back and neck argh!!!! I hate locust as it is!! But chinstand definitely feels more stable. I like to go into it from eka pada kondinayasana or from 3-legged dog and it feels quite OK. It can be a backbend or a handstand, although I prefer it as a slight backbend to updog. I was also confused because my instructor called it 'locust' and I was wondering if she was talking about chinstand or locust... I didn't know you could combine the two. Me: So you're talking about chinstand with a scorpion backbend? She: No, it's a locust variation. Me: i think I'm going to give it a pass.... I"m not sure about that (and I"m usually quite daring).
  14. I hate that variation of chinstand! My instructor tried to explain how to get into it because I asked for a challenge, and I was like "you're kidding right?" Put my fists under my stomach and what!?? Suffice to say I just do the regular one with chataranga arms...
  15. Hi all! I got my mala in the mail today and I must confess I'm so in love It's so full of colours yet so grounded. It's made out of onyx, African bloodstone and marbled obsidian with a lava guru bead and a red tassel. My question for you guys is how you usually cleanse and program it? I saw Candace to an entry on using mala, but I wasn't 100% clear about what to do before I start using them. I kind of want them to make me feel grounded and protected, and to shield against negative energy (since I've been feeling a bit of that coming in lately).
  16. There are some moments when I"m doing my yoga practice that I feel I'm completely present and inside my body. I feel the yoga flow through me and it's a wonderful feeling! In that sense, I do feel that yoga is more a moving meditation more than everything. And as with any form of meditative activity, there are periods where you feel more 'at one' with yourself and periods where it is hard to get on your mat. For me, the yoga practice is a good way to 'reset' myself in any case so I feel more at peace, even if it's a few minutes of it.
  17. Hi! I'm curious whether any of you have taken 500 hours programs as I've enrolled in one and I'm not sure what your opinions are on having more rather than less teacher training. Is 200hr very different from 500hr trainings? I've been told a lot that 200hr is really not enough. What are your opinions?
  18. Thanks so much for the advice! I really love the school I inscribed in and here is the program: Yeah, it's mostly because it's a long commitment (1-2 years) and I kind of want to teach right now! Also, a huge monetary investment and the difference between a 200hr and a 500hr is $2000 in my bank account, haha! I've heard of intensive trainings, and I'd love to do one, but I'm also more willing to invest that money into a course that I'm familiar with and I've heard a lot of good things about from friends and also other teachers in other studios. They do weekend intensives which fits well with my working schedule, but I may have to do sell some art to make up for the loss! I'm really really excited about starting, though. I ask also because so many people have done 200hr trainings and they say it is not enough... and it's rare to find people who have committed to a 500 hour training because it is a lot!
  19. Haha I think this all the time! It's a reason why I want to teach it ^^
  20. Oh! I wasn't referring to your friend at all. I think that the fact she went through those experiences and rose up better to educate others about it in psychiatry is amazing and so, so important. I wish there were more people like her. I just mean it in the sense that in our culture of weight loss and health obsession, things like eating disorders are often misunderstood even in psychiatric circles. It's people like her who will change the shape of the future. I'm so glad that she decided to use her experience to the benefit of future sufferers.
  21. Oh, wow! That is powerful. I remember when I was malnourished (even if it wasn't characteristic because I was eating 3 meals like a "normal person". But I was in a state of perpetual stress and restricting my 'true appetite' because of my living situation at that time... I was already considered a 'hunger monster' and I felt a lot of shame about my appetite. I went to a psychiatrist too and they just told me I was 'spoiled' and had to get over my idea of how much i should eat and eat tilI I was sick. That wasn't encouraging and put me off psychiatrists for some time!), I definitely felt like my body and mind were at odds and continuously fighting. Such trauma is hard to get over, I think. The body remembers it. When I first did yoga, I felt dizzy and confused, but slowly it became like a "check-in" so I could see where my body was at that given time and breathe through it. It was a huge release to be in my physical body and not have it be antagonistic to me. It really helps with the trauma of being malnourished, especially over time . That quote is hence really profound for me! As for my friend... I feel like it is even harder when it is someone close to you, who has gone through numerous treatments (I haven't), and none of them worked. And to be able to talk about how yoga has benefited me in recovery in general- a super super long process that can admittedly last years- sort of falls on deaf ears since she doesn't want me to tell her to honour her hunger and to go for that 'binge' because it's what she needs... I still have periods of extreme hunger and I find having my husband next to me just qualls the anxiety so i can "breathe through it". When we rush through any meal, I find there is no space. That is also a habit I'm still having to cultivate- to breathe *when* I'm eating. Eating with my husband helps a lot. It's difficult when I'm alone and I have to be accountable to myself! Until now, I don't know what I experienced is a ED or not because I feel so much shame about having been told numerous times when I was physically malnourished that I was anorexic and I should just eat till I was sick by people who supposedly loved me. So I feel like I can't 'come out' with it, per se. Even if I can identify with a lot of it. It's harder when you don't have an 'enemy' besides yourself... For me, I associated that state of denying yourself with a certain environment and once I left it, recovery came easy (I associated eating with nourishing my needs for the first time rather than sacrificing myself physically so as not to be too 'grotesque'). I think it's not always so easy for most.
  22. So... I was going into handstand today and I could feel something move in the little finger side of my right palm, and a piercing pain followed. Now I can't put my hand at a 90 degrees angle without it hurting, but otherwise it's fine. There is no pain unless I put it in that position. Any ideas what happened? Is it a sprain? How do I treat it? I don't feel any pain at all otherwise... I feel so sad because I may not be able to do normal yoga anymore How long will it heal!? I hope it will magically go away I guess this is the yoga. Sigh....
  23. I hate bow pose, warrior 2 for more than 4 breaths, locust, camel (I usually just wiggle my way out of those backbends if they're offered and do wheel). I also don't like side angle... unless it's a wrapped side-angle. Why? i don't quite know! I also don't like lunge twists... I'm not sure why. Oh and half-moon twisted is horrible! I wonder if the poses you dislike tells something about you! hahaha.
  24. Thanks for the info! That link is very useful. I have been trying to pay attention to wrist alignment since I have had wrist issues in the past. It's easy to hyperextend for me, and not to focus my weight evenly... I've been trying to practice the index finger thing after watching the kino video on hyperextending wrists. It's a work everyday to be conscious of that. In this case I am pretty sure it is not a wrist injury. The pain was a shooting pain originating from the deepest part of my right palm, higher up near the little finger. It only appears if I twist it from downdog > wheel pose (so not doing that anymore). I feel stability when in plank (I've been trying to be even more conscious, so maybe it's a good thing?) when I did some yoga yesterday and today. I'm not sure what kind of thing happened, so I was curious as to whether this happened to anyone before!
  25. I guess I'm a bad yogi. I eat meat (although I prefer fish. Not a fan of meat), I hate juices (of any kinds, let alone green juices!), I don't like chanting (I associate it with conformity even if it really isn't, I just don't like being told what to do), I love cake (is this yogic?), and I can be competitive, if only with myself. Oh and meditation makes me crazy! I prefer daydreaming on the bus, does that count?